text posts on tumblr about things happening in school be like
oh how the mackles have mored
Not the time for a dad joke.
I swear to god bruh
Let me catch you in the streets
Bruh I swear to god
please watch your fucking language
did u guys see me at the oscars
You looked great, pizza. Congrats on everything. I love you.
Thanks, John. I love you too.
meryl, brad and i at the oscars
once i had a dream that my cat was working at mcdonalds w/ me and she had a lil uniform and she kept getting fur in the fries and everyone was yelling at me and saying “ur cat sucks on fries” and i was like “shes just a cat give her a break!” and i woke up crying
Direct quote from my boyfriend, turned into a picture.
look at this Funky little duck
please look at this duck
fuck the duck
DO NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!THE DUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
a couple days ago my brother was driving and he saw a traffic camera flash at him but he was going the speed limit so he drove by it 5 more times thinking it was funny because he was doing nothing wrong and today he got 6 tickets in the mail for driving without a seat belt
today my little brother (hes six) put a seashell to his ear and told me the ocean said im a nerd
The evolution of answering “what time is it?”
"Time to get a watch XD"
"T̨̹̲̖͚̫̩͈i͍̰̜m̳̩̩̲̼̫̭e̵̲̻̻̼̟̱ ͏͍͉͔̪t̵̝̺o g̢̮̖̦è͈̰͍͈͓̟t̟̮͚̻̤͓̠̀ ̻̼̻c̬͟r̸͙̻̮̩ea̺̲̰̤̬͚͠ͅt̙̹̟ì̟v̳͓͖̺̀ȩ̫̼.̢"
Time to d-d-d-d-d-duel